Friends Don’t Spoon and Other Signs You’re Becoming ‘More Versus Friends’ Along With Your BFF


I’m a lesbian. Therefore then that’s a big warning sign for me if i get touchy-feely with a girl, and it feels right. We don’t get touchy-feely EVER with my right girlfriends or my completely platonic lesbian buddies. However, if we begin to get all pretty and snuggly with another lez, and unexpectedly I’m dropping into her arms when I’m loose and drunk rather than in my own head—I’m feelings that are definitely feeling beyond the safe realms of “friendship. ”

Your eyes illuminate when you speak about her.

Don’t misunderstand me, i enjoy my buddies. I’m proud of all of the epic shit they’ve accomplished within their lives that are short. They are loved by me.


My eyes don’t illuminate such as a million trillion twinkling Christmas time lights once I speak about them. Among the surefire signs i prefer, like a woman occurs when my mom says “Darling, your eyes illuminate when you talk I know I’m screwed about her! ” That’s when.

See, the eyes, they don’t lie. You may. However your eyes will perhaps not.

You can’t stop considering her.

Whenever I’m teeming with anxiety sometimes I’ll feel compelled to text one of my besties as well as a brand new friend, for help. And my tribe of buddies certainly crosses my mind during the day. Oh, Ruby would want those footwear. Eduardo would hate this prick. Owen would love this restaurant. We have to get together sometime.


Just as much they aren’t spinning through my mind constantly as I love my friends. I don’t daydream about being I can’t see them whenever I please) around them(unless they’re in jail and. Whenever my head constantly circles back into ONE woman, and therefore woman occurs to be gay too, it um, means one thing. Something dangerous!

You feel a ZAP of electricity go through your body when she touches your arm.

We don’t really notice whenever my buddies touch me personally. It simply sort of occurs. An agreeable shove of this neck. A mild pat on the trunk. A hug goodbye that is brief. A meaningless European peck on the cheek… Yawn.


We completely notice when I’m intimately goddamn drawn to somebody if I am touched by them! In fact, i’m A zap that is intoxicating of swoop through my human body also it feels jarring and sexy and terrifying and oh—i’d like it to help keep happening and taking place and happening…

Yeah, that does not take place when Ruby touches me personally, OK?

You’ve got a desire that is bizarre introduce to her to your blood family members or opted for family members.

I adore that numerous of my close friends are becoming close with my mother. It will make me feel hot and cozy inside like we’re all becoming ONE giant loving family members.


When you’ve got a burning, primal need to introduce to your “new friend” to your loved ones, opted for or bloodstream, it is well worth looking at, girl. It is inside our genetic makeup products to desire approval from our families over our intimate partners. We stress over whatever they shall think about her. We’ll be irritating and inquire our house users ten thousand times whatever they looked at her. It is within ourselves, are wanting to know… will she fit into the pack because we secretly, deep down? Will we be co-parents together? Will my sis treat her just like a cousin if they become sister-in-laws?

Day you want to know every detail about her.

If one thing dramatic or happens that are exciting i would like my buddies to inform me personally exactly about it. I enjoy nothing but to salaciously gossip with my buddies ( it is known by me’s sinful, but We don’t really give two shits. We threw in the towel medications, gossip is perhaps all We have actually kept). I enjoy the art of chatting. Let’s have “cawfee talk. ” Or a “chin wag” as they do say in England.


Whenever I’m mesmerized by every small moment information of your day, whenever explaining your cup tea in my experience is grossly charming, whenever I’m fascinated by that which you consumed for lunch—or have always been feeling extremely concerned in the event that subway really was crowded on the road working or wracked with stress for you, girl that you were too busy to take a proper lunch break—I’ve got it bad.

You’re having… goals.

I’m notorious for making love dreams intensely about the essential extremely improper people that I’m not interested in at all. Recently I had an intercourse dream of a guy and I’m the gayest homosexual to ever occur. Intercourse dreams simply take place. We don’t understand why they happen, nevertheless they happen. Incessantly. To all or any of us you’re that is(unless a psychotropic drug that is killed your libido totally. )


If you’re having

Aspirations, it translates to one thing profoundly profound. If you’re not merely f*cking your buddy in your ideal, but marrying them, or you’re clutching each other’s fingers and seeking into each other’s eyes…and you wake up feeling all hot and lovey-dovey after which freaked the f*ck out because she’s SIMPLY THE BUDDY and you also can’t shake this lovey-dovey feeling even if you are taking a freezing cold bath… it is well worth looking at. Trust in me.

You spoon.

I’ve positively been therefore plastered within my time it was my girlfriend that I accidentally woke up spooning Eduardo, thinking. But whenever we woke up and discovered it absolutely was HIM we had my hands around and not HER, I would personally scream, therefore we would hysterically laugh about this for the remainder time.


Whenever I’ve been sober or perhaps a bit buzzed and discovered myself being spooned by my buddy, and extremely enjoying itlike her… it means… I. Sigh. Purr.

For spooning is really a wildly intimate work of love in which to take part in. I might argue that spooning is a lot more intimate and vulnerable then intercourse. I could have sex with (almost) anyone. But i could just spoon with individuals i prefer. Since when you spoon, you can’t conceal behind such a thing. There is absolutely no intercourse, no moaning, no sweating… it is pure affection. So when spooning seems appropriate, this means your bodies together fit perfectly. Just like a puzzle!

And do you know what? It doesn’t matter what physical stature your friend that is best is, we guarantee your systems don’t make a perfect set of suitable, gorgeous parentheses when connected. That’s exclusive to enthusiasts.


If you’re participating in one or more of those tell-tale indications having a “friend” I would personally just simply take an extended, difficult look into the mirror. Come on with your self, woman.

Of course she’s solitary, and you’re single… we dare you to definitely carry it as much as her. Swallowing emotions is for the poor. And you’re numerous things. But “weak” just isn’t one of these. Don’t bother about ruining the friendship. If you’re cuddling and spooning and texting one another every ten seconds, you’re perhaps not really friends anyhow. You’re “more than buddies” plus it’s well worth exploring.

The worst thing that may happen? You can get refused. Big deal that is f*cking. Rejection can’t destroy us. Curbing our feelings can kill our spirits, however. And life is meaningless without spirit. So dive in. You’ve got nothing to readily lose however your pride. And pride is stupid anyway. You’re better down without it. We swear to your Indigo Girls.